Hello there.
It's 17:30. I'm at the airport in Oslo. I've been here since about 15:30 and my flight leaves at 21:05. I decided to arrive that early because a) I'd completed my day's work, and b) there's a strike on by the security guards at the airport. The expected queuing time through security was 1 hour and 15 minutes. It took me 40 minutes.
I knew there was a strike on; it was supposed to start on Friday morning at 06:00, which is why I got there at 05:07, but it didn't start until 20:00 that evening. It's now a week later and still there has been no resolution to the talks. But who cares!? As long as I get to see my Bumbler, I don't care who's on strike! Call me selfish, or a shell fish for that matter, but that's who I am. Kajsa "Shell fish" Tylen. Yeah, so where was I? Right, I knew there was a strike on so I logged on to the airport webcam (http://www.osl.no/osl/omoss/_presse/_webkamera) where I closely monitored the queue situation from work. The picture is sent every 15 seconds, which means all sorts of possibly hilarious situations, but they're not hilarious if nobody is watching as I found when I got to the airport. Kirsti had probably gone home and I couldn't think of anyone else to annoy. Ha, but I could watch myself on my phone! Which turns out to not be as much fun as I was expecting. If someone was watching I could've hidden in various places with just one body part showing, and the person watching had 15 seconds to figure out where I was before I moved to the next place. But instead I decided to do some planking. If you're not familiar with planking, you might want to read this: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Planking_(fad)
So, my plan was to go in to the clear area in the middle of the webcam screen, and plank. I was phyched up and ready for action when I arrived, but when I got there, I realised there were quite a few people about and I lost my nerve. This was the best I could do:
That's me on the floor in the middle of your screen.
But I needn't have worried!! Turns out I'm invisible!! Except to the webcam of course. I joined the security queue at the back, as honest people do, but kept getting overtaken by a woman. Of course, I can't stand for that kind of behaviour so I started blocking her. But turns out she, and her travelling partner (who I don't think was her lover but I reckon he wanted to be), couldn't see me. Why else would they repeatedly walk into my gorgeous little suitcase? But in true 'silent war' style, I because to become very unpredictable with my bag, and sometimes it just happened to roll back and squish some toes. But still, it continued relentlessly. I wondered if I might be wearing my invisibility cloak - it sometimes falls on top of me when I least expect it.
Anyhoo, we had been at the silent war for about 20 minutes or so when we queued in an open area, and someone tried to sneak in infront of me (don't think he saw me either). Well, this was more than I would accept! I said to the chap: "excuse me, the queue is over there", while pointing to where myself and the annoying couple behind me joined the queue. The man had been BUSTED!! He quickly folded into a posture of embarrassment and skulked off. The man in front of me in the queue (who's bag I had not kicked once during the entire queuing period, fyi) turned round, looked at me, and said "good call". Not just once, but twice. Well, well, well, seems like my cloak fell off during my confrontation with 'Sneaky'. And the couple behind me said "well done" and stopped kicking my bag. It was a proud moment. :)
No, what does one do in an airport for four and a half hours (other than write a ridiculously long blog about naff-all)? Shopping of course!! Except I'm not shopping at the moment, I'll get my ass kicked by my BFF if I go shopping. So instead I tried some sun glasses on. Here are a few of my favourites:
When I say 'my favourites', I mean 'the biggest glasses I could find'.
Now I'm bored. I've eaten (pizza), played Rumble, and listened to numerous screaming children, and now I'm bored. I don't mean I'm bored of writing this blog, I find it very therapeutic, but just bored of being at these airport. And I'm bored of listening to the guy on the tannoy telling everyone that "this is the last and final call for passengers [insert random passenger names] to join flight [insert random destination]". Twice.
It's 17:30. I'm at the airport in Oslo. I've been here since about 15:30 and my flight leaves at 21:05. I decided to arrive that early because a) I'd completed my day's work, and b) there's a strike on by the security guards at the airport. The expected queuing time through security was 1 hour and 15 minutes. It took me 40 minutes.
I knew there was a strike on; it was supposed to start on Friday morning at 06:00, which is why I got there at 05:07, but it didn't start until 20:00 that evening. It's now a week later and still there has been no resolution to the talks. But who cares!? As long as I get to see my Bumbler, I don't care who's on strike! Call me selfish, or a shell fish for that matter, but that's who I am. Kajsa "Shell fish" Tylen. Yeah, so where was I? Right, I knew there was a strike on so I logged on to the airport webcam (http://www.osl.no/osl/omoss/_presse/_webkamera) where I closely monitored the queue situation from work. The picture is sent every 15 seconds, which means all sorts of possibly hilarious situations, but they're not hilarious if nobody is watching as I found when I got to the airport. Kirsti had probably gone home and I couldn't think of anyone else to annoy. Ha, but I could watch myself on my phone! Which turns out to not be as much fun as I was expecting. If someone was watching I could've hidden in various places with just one body part showing, and the person watching had 15 seconds to figure out where I was before I moved to the next place. But instead I decided to do some planking. If you're not familiar with planking, you might want to read this: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Planking_(fad)
So, my plan was to go in to the clear area in the middle of the webcam screen, and plank. I was phyched up and ready for action when I arrived, but when I got there, I realised there were quite a few people about and I lost my nerve. This was the best I could do:
That's me on the floor in the middle of your screen.
But I needn't have worried!! Turns out I'm invisible!! Except to the webcam of course. I joined the security queue at the back, as honest people do, but kept getting overtaken by a woman. Of course, I can't stand for that kind of behaviour so I started blocking her. But turns out she, and her travelling partner (who I don't think was her lover but I reckon he wanted to be), couldn't see me. Why else would they repeatedly walk into my gorgeous little suitcase? But in true 'silent war' style, I because to become very unpredictable with my bag, and sometimes it just happened to roll back and squish some toes. But still, it continued relentlessly. I wondered if I might be wearing my invisibility cloak - it sometimes falls on top of me when I least expect it.
Anyhoo, we had been at the silent war for about 20 minutes or so when we queued in an open area, and someone tried to sneak in infront of me (don't think he saw me either). Well, this was more than I would accept! I said to the chap: "excuse me, the queue is over there", while pointing to where myself and the annoying couple behind me joined the queue. The man had been BUSTED!! He quickly folded into a posture of embarrassment and skulked off. The man in front of me in the queue (who's bag I had not kicked once during the entire queuing period, fyi) turned round, looked at me, and said "good call". Not just once, but twice. Well, well, well, seems like my cloak fell off during my confrontation with 'Sneaky'. And the couple behind me said "well done" and stopped kicking my bag. It was a proud moment. :)
No, what does one do in an airport for four and a half hours (other than write a ridiculously long blog about naff-all)? Shopping of course!! Except I'm not shopping at the moment, I'll get my ass kicked by my BFF if I go shopping. So instead I tried some sun glasses on. Here are a few of my favourites:
When I say 'my favourites', I mean 'the biggest glasses I could find'.
Now I'm bored. I've eaten (pizza), played Rumble, and listened to numerous screaming children, and now I'm bored. I don't mean I'm bored of writing this blog, I find it very therapeutic, but just bored of being at these airport. And I'm bored of listening to the guy on the tannoy telling everyone that "this is the last and final call for passengers [insert random passenger names] to join flight [insert random destination]". Twice.
That [random passenger name] is always late. Makes you wonder whether they really want to get to [random destination] at all! They must be wasting a lot of [random currency].
ReplyDeleteYou may call me Unknown or Dave R, depending on how odd your blog is.
ReplyDelete"this is the last and final call for passengers Tylen and Tylen to join flight to Tyland, or where was it we were going?
ReplyDeleteDon't know but it was Ryanair at Stansted. :)
Delete